I have always wanted to find a way to break the loop of
thoughts that my brain tends to go on when I’m upset, outraged or anxious. I imagine
my brain all puffed up and angry, arms akimbo, quite like the fish vendor outraged
when a customer tries to drive down the price really low. And then, these questions will
explode in a staccato burst: How can ‘they’? How dare ‘they’? What do ‘they’
think of themselves?
My brain builds up the ‘opponent: they’ as this giant Goliath
that it enjoys aiming multiple slingshots at. These slingshots are counter
arguments which never occur to it in real time. :P And what a high is the cycle
of rebuttals and counter arguments where my brain shows off its rapier wit
while the opponent is conveniently silenced by virtue of their non-existence in
my brain space. :P No wonder the brain refuses to get off the thought loop!
But I was aware that though the thought cycle gave me a
high, it didn’t really achieve much because in real-time my ‘opponents’ are
rarely struck dumb by my barbs and repartee. Plus, it was doing zilch to calm
down my anxiety or outrage, considering it was busy stoking it to volcanic
stress levels especially once the pandemic struck. So, I asked around and all I
got was that with time I would feel better. But that doesn’t happen. Time doesn’t
have magical, healing properties at least to impatient me wanting instant
gratification. I needed to find tools to get off this useless loop that was
going nowhere and so I went looking and found some. Different tools work at
different times but usually at least one of them works. So here goes:
Box / Square Breathing
We also know this as the pranayama practice of breath control
in yoga. You breathe in for four counts, hold for four counts, breathe out
for four counts and hold for four counts, and repeat. You can set a timer for
5 minutes to do this on loop. Why is it called box or square breathing? Because
it helps to imagine a box and your breath travelling along its sides: your inhalation goes up the left side of the box,
holding steady on the top horizontal side moving from left to right, coming
down through your exhalation on the right side of the box and holding steady as
it travels from right to left on the bottom side. You can switch around the
sides as you like.
Eckhart Tolle’s Energy Fields
This one was a recommendation when my anxiety and thought
cycles were at their height at the beginning of the pandemic in 2020. I watched
this video by Eckhart Tolle. He explains how worries and anxieties about the
future are thoughts that serve no purpose. When the time comes, we will deal
with things. It makes no sense to suffer by imagining what ifs. Then he goes on
to demonstrate a simple exercise that has helped me to switch off from the
thought cycle by simply closing my eyes and focussing on the energy in my
hands. Now, whether the energy is real or imaginary, the purpose is to take the
mind’s attention off the cycle which it does.
Laughter via funny videos
After becoming aware of my thought cycles, I am now more
alert to when they begin. So, I immediately watch funny videos, usually on
YouTube since they are just right there and handy. My preference is for funny
videos of toddlers or those of young animals. You can choose
what makes you laugh. It takes a minute, because the thought cycle is not
willing to just let me go. But by the end of 5-10 minutes my laughter has
neatly distracted me from the worry. I calm down enough to think of practical solutions.
Calm down the hollering baby
So this one I figured out for myself and it works for me.
Whenever my brain goes on a rampage about all the injustices done to it, the
unfairness and worry, I imagine my brain as a baby bawling its head off. You
know that pretend, angry howling because the baby didn’t get what it wants and
wants it right now? Yup, instant gratification. I imagine myself holding that
baby, patting its back and calming it down, the way we usually do with crying
babies. I pat and comfort it till the baby has calmed down and because it’s
taken the form of a baby the brain’s outrage and stress becomes much smaller
than me and therefore far more handleable.
Read Anxiety as Excitement
I am one of those who gets really anxious when trying
something new and I have the super power to make myself absolutely miserable:
rumbling tummy, fast heart beat and all. So, a thought occurred to me. What if
I take these symptoms and tell myself that they are caused by excitement and
not anxiety? I tried it and to my surprise, it worked! Funnily, a few days later,
I read about the same tactic in the book Seven and a Half Lessons About the
Brain. The book is by Lisa Feldman Barrett who works in the fields of cognitive
neuroscience and psychology. It is a fascinating book
of which this tactic is but a part. The professor cites several studies to tell
us that that the brain is an extremely flexible organ. It behaves the way
you teach it to behave or in this case teach it to interpret data. The book also emphasizes that the
power to change the way you thinks rests with you, only if you choose to use it,
no matter your age or circumstances.
So, these are my tools but I am always on the lookout for more. If you know of practical tactics that deal with anxiety, thought cycles and stress, do share. J
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